how in the world

I know full well that most adults procreate during the course of their lifetime, but that doesn't make it any less amazing to me. A human life can be made. You can't control when you make it, it's not like making a sandwich or making a model airplane, but you can make one. In many ways, it seems like the prototype for how effort and chance work together to form the future. You eliminate the birth control (in most cases), try repeatedly, keep her legs elevated afterwards...and then you wait. And sometimes the test shows two pink lines.

Today I found out that I'm going to be a father. At least, if all goes well and health and development are sustained. I'm overwhelmed; not in a frantic or anxious way, but in a quiet way, almost like if I were looking at Michelangelo's David, or watching a 50-foot wave on a surfing video or setting eyes on a tropical beach for the first time. I can't believe this is real.

But somehow, in God's divine plan, today was a day for B. and I to become aware that we possess the ability to make a life. And our hopes and dreams and thoughts and prayers and fears and excitement have all been kindled and are being prepared for use. I don't know how in the world it actually happens (beyond the science stuff, zygotes and what not) but today it happened for us. Today life hit with something sweet.